Chapter 4: fireworks

So, it turns out I was wrong... there's a first time for everything people.
Trevor wasn't a player.

After the second date there was a third and a fourth date and at the end of each date we were trying to come up with reasons to see each other again. I couldn't figure out why such a great guy liked me so much, so quickly, but he did... and I liked him... a lot.

I had one problem though. I was going to marry "my missionary" remember?
Well, believe it or not this was still my plan even though I really liked Trevor. I had cared about this missionary guy for a really long time and all signs pointed to us getting married. Now I just had to break it to Trevor. This is where the story gets uncomfortable.

We had just gone on our fourth date (fireworks at Weber state) and it was another amazing night. On the way home we were talking and Trevor started telling me how much he cared about me then he said, "oh yeah, but isn't your missionary coming home next month?" I froze, how did he know? He started laughing and I realized he was just kidding. He didn't know... but when he saw my expression he stopped laughing and I said, "actually he will be home in 2 months."
Silence in the car... very awkward silence.
He finally said, "So you are telling me that you are waiting for a missionary?"
"ummmm" I knew I had to be honest so I explained as best I could the situation... I had a long history with this guy and had been writing him throughout his mission. He would be home very soon...
I felt sick inside. I knew that Trevor was hurt.
We talked about it the whole way home...
The conversation was heavy...
It was a long drive home.
When it was time to say good-bye Trevor hugged me tight for a long time and then out of no where he kissed me. Not a normal "first kiss" kind of kiss, more like a "I'm staking my claim" kind of kiss.
Then he hugged me again and whispered, "just give US a chance."
Still stunned by the kiss I managed an "okay".